Introducing My First Ever Brother-In-Law

... and his darling new wife. Jordan and I go WAY back. There's this Primary song about the baptism of Jesus that tells how he was baptized "in the river Jordan's flow." I remember learning the song in church one Sunday and not grasping the larger picture, but imagining a bunch of Jordan Pearts flowing in a river. We grew up in the same neighborhood til we moved when I was 13, but we still attended the same jr. high and high schools. While we never ate lunch at the same table or ran around with the same crowd, I always remember respecting him from a distance. He seemed like the kind of guy who didn't need to experiment with some of the garbage those stages of life can offer. He seemed to have it together.

He had Chelsea from day one. Their wedding day was among one of the sweetest days of my life. Days like that are the very substance of life because of moments like this

and all the quiet ones happening in your heart reassuring you that these people and these times are what matter the very most.

Grandmas and Grandpas

I have had lunch in the homes of both sets of my grandparents in the past week. I feel it's such a blessing to still have all of them here with me. I was so fortunate to have a very happy childhood and their homes and their presence was very much a part of that. It's fun for me not to just tell Danilo and Grace what my grandparents were like, they are sitting right next to me experiencing it too.

With my Grandma Parke on her 70th birthday

 Yesterday we were at my Grandma and Grandpa Achter's to hike the trail to a waterfall you can access about an hour from their backyard. For the first time in my life my 82 year old grandpa said he'd love to go but didn't think his health would allow it that day. Instead, he hiked with us about nine or ten minutes to drop us off at the main trail. With a twinkle in his eye my grandpa told us to enjoy our youth while we still have bounce in our step. I say he said it with a twinkle in his eye because there was not a hint of regret in his voice. Really what he was saying was, I encourage you to enjoy life to the extent that I have.

After we returned from the waterfall, we had the kind of lunch that is characteristic to my grandparents' house... carrot and raisin salad, potato salad, tuna fish and celery sandwiches, and pumpkin cookies for dessert. The kind of lunch that used to make me sigh inside and wonder, where's the macaroni and cheese? Now that my taste buds and I have grown up, it's the kind of lunch that I love because of the way it takes me back to my childhood in one bite. I forgot the brown cow. I don't know if anyone else calls root beer and milk poured in the same glass a brown cow, but my grandpa always has.

When I turned out the light last night, I thought about the couple hours spent at my grandparents' home and thought, I think that was important. I wanted to remember it.

Going up to the waterfall with my Grandpa Achter, Memorial Day 2007

I know I am fortunate and that sometimes other factors come into play, but I'm thankful for the way both my mom's and my dad's parents have taken good care of themselves so that my new little family has been able to enjoy them too.

I would really love to thank the police officer who may have altered the course of my husband's life a couple of decades ago

Danilo's mom told me this story a few Sundays ago. It's a little gem. Just when I thought I knew all there was to know about Danilo Collado. 

I'll do my best, a few things always get lost in translation, but as I understood it, when Danilo was 13 and living in Miami, he decided he was going to join a gang. The boys who were going to let him join told him he had to steal something from the store. 

Petrified, Danilo went in and grabbed the easiest thing he could find, a little Hot Wheels car. He'd caught a clerk's eye who followed him out the door and apprehended him. I'm not sure when the officer arrived on the scene, but this was the critical part. The officer had the opportunity to give Danilo a mild talking to and send him on his way. What difference would it make to haul this kid to the police station? Would it be worth the time and effort?

It made a huge difference.

The officer measured an appropriate amount of justice on my husband. He did take him to the police station. He probably received a good talking to. He instructed Danilo to call his mom and ask her to come get him.

Danilo started to cry. His mom was pregnant. She worked hard, and they didn't have a lot of money. This was going to make her sad. The thought was painful to Danilo.

My mother-in-law said she didn't stay long at the station once she arrived to pick up her son. She said there was an understanding between her and the officer that her having to come down and pick him up and knowing it would disappoint her was punishment enough. 

He didn't get into the gang. And he never tried again. It's a cute story, but I shudder to think where Danilo could be today if the officer had let him get away with it with no more than a slap on the hand.  If the 13-year-old son of a soon to be single mom living in Miami had ended up joining the gang, or even just learned that illegal activity only equals a slap on the hand.

Would his future have turned out the same? I can't say for sure. I decided awhile ago not to worry about what-ifs. Because this is what we have, and I'm so thankful.

Dr. Quinn at Night

I'm still growing up in the way that I get emotional over movies... let me explain.

I think especially as girls, if we hear that a movie is a tear-jerker, we feel like we should cry while we watch it. "Did you cry?" we ask each other. And so as a 12, 13, 14-year-old, I would force tears to come during really sad shows, probably just so I could fit in.

And then as I got older, some movies really did make me feel like crying, and I would cry freely if I was alone, and not so much if people and especially boys were in the room.

And the funny thing is, that's kind of still where I am. I don't know if any of you have husbands like this, but at a particularly emotional part of a movie, Danilo will check for my reaction to see if I am crying. And he doesn't really do it subtly, either. Cute boy. So there's a lot of potential for me to feel awkward.

But there's something that's so satisfying about crying over something that was worth crying over.

My favorite way to cry over a movie is at extremely beautiful or happy moments, and there have been a lot of those lately. Danilo got me the entire Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman series for Christmas this year, and I have never enjoyed a gift so continuously. Because Danilo will watch it with me, I live all day for Dr. Quinn at night.  

My vote for the most beautiful love story in all the television and movies I have ever seen goes to Dr. Mike and Sully. There is just so much substance to it. Sigh. I can't get enough.

These scenes back to back have been the most satisfying of the whole series so far. I got emotional just reading the taglines on YouTube when I was trying to pull them up. They are beautiful. Watch it full screen. Enjoy.

Sully travels from Colorado to Boston to check on Dr. Quinn and her children who have been gone visiting for more than a month. While Colorado has made a frontierswoman out of Dr. Quinn, she's reverted back to some of her Boston ways and is a little embarrassed when Sully shows up... after staying awhile and sensing it was a bad idea (the trip and pursuing a relationship with Dr. Quinn), Sully catches a train home....

Making Peace With the Internet

I decided Sunday night when I was sitting at the front of a new week that I was going to make peace with the internet.

There is a lot I love about the internet. It connects us. It's useful and informational and entertaining.

We also know the internet has the potential to be destructive and a time-waster, and can suck the very joy out of our lives.

My biggest beef with the internet personally is when it keeps me from being productive. There are times when I close the laptop and think, I think I could've done a lot more with the last 45 minutes of my life than I just did, and I have nothing to show for it except being totally up-to-date on the trip a friend from high school took to Rome.

So several weeks ago, I made a deal with myself. My getting on the internet had a lot to do with checking to see if things had changed... checking my email, checking on my business, checking my Facebook... so I decided I could get on twice a day, once at 11 am and once at 5 pm to see what had changed in my little spots on the internet. It was somewhat effective. I got a lot accomplished before logging on.  But whoops, I needed to pull up the internet to follow that recipe I was making for dinner, and that couldn't wait til 5 pm. I needed to pull up the internet to transfer some money from checking to savings. I need to pull up the internet to see if the chair I'm watching on KSL has dropped in price. And part of me would say, "Oh, good, I'll get on really fast AND see if I have email," and the more disciplined part of me would say, "You will not, you will get on, get what you need, and get back off." This battle has been going on for awhile.

And sometimes when I had been really diligent at staying off the computer until my designated times, and then discovered not much had happened, like I hadn't gotten responses from the emails I was hoping to, it made me grumpier than I'd like to admit.

Darn, I knew the internet could have an affect on my mood, and I don't like the way it makes me feel when I allow it to. 

So this is what I decided Sunday night after a good day of church. I know Heavenly Father cares about (what seem like) the trivial matters of my life, and I prayed for help this week to use the internet better than I have been... and this is what I was able to come up with.

The internet is like a catalog and a recipe book and a phone directory and a newspaper and a bank and a mailbox and I might have to access it several times a day. But when I do, before I click on that link or press play on that YouTube video or even log in to Facebook at all :), I stop and think, is this going to bring me up or bring me down? I imagine an up and a down arrow sitting in the top corner of my laptop. Sometimes the answer is, down. I know that the real reason I want to search for new recipes for dessert is so that I can avoid vacuuming the house, and I know that I will feel better when the house is vacuumed than I will with six new pins on my Pinterest dessert board, and so I close the laptop and grab the vacuum. Sometimes the answer is, up, my sister is in New York this week and I want to know if she got my message or posted any new pictures. 

I'm happy to say that it's been working. And that's how I have made peace with the internet this week.

Thanks for Visiting!

(Last updated September 28, 2012)

NEW: My Facebook "shop" is now open!!! A selection of jewelry and hair accessories are now available for purchase and shipment all over the U.S.

If I had hand-picked my ideal job, it wouldn't have been as good as this. I work the majority of the time from home, and when I must go out to conduct business, I have such a fun time! I sell Paparazzi products at home parties. Every piece retails for $5, except for the Starlet Shimmer section that's geared toward younger girls that sells for even less. 

Why I enjoy selling Paparazzi:

1. I have a jewelry shop in my basement (good and bad news... an outfit never need go unaccessorized)
2. I put as much time into it as I want to. When I work hard, it pays off. But if it ever needs to take a back burner, I can pick up where I left off when life settles back down. 
3. Going to work means getting out and spending time with women in their homes with their friends and family for a couple hours. It provides an outlet I don't think I even knew I needed (WE HAVE FUN)!
4. It li-te-ra-ly sells itself. It's beautiful and it's affordable.
5. I make 45% commission off jewelry sales. I made back half of what I had put into it in one night. Plus there is the opportunity to make more through the company's compensation plan.  And most of all...
6. It fits my stay-at-home mom lifestyle

Why women enjoy Paparazzi parties:

1. They are low pressure. Women who came only to support a friend can get out the door for only $5....
2. ....But most women are happily surprised to find out when they get there that they have stumbled in on something WONDERFUL... a room full of accessories where not a single one costs more than $5...
3. ....which is naturally followed by almost zero guilt.... unless they purchase an entire display board worth.
4. I almost forgot... almost every necklace has a small set of earrings attached. $5. Women LOVE that!

Please contact me to find out more about how it all works. Send me an email and please include your:

• name
• state and
• phone number

I will be in touch with you within 24 hours. I look forward to talking to you!!

Brittney Collado
#1551
brittneycollado@gmail.com
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Paparazzi-Jewelry-by-Brittney-Collado/260174333992659

See Paparazzi's newly launched website here.

Nephi, Blogging, and a Bout with Depression

If you haven't ever met Nephi, I am thrilled that I get the chance to introduce you. Nephi is the first prophet whose story is told in the Book of Mormon, and he is physically and morally strong. He is the youngest of his brothers, but because the oldest two are hard-hearted and generally choose wickedness over what is right, the Lord chooses Nephi to be a ruler over them. The two books of Nephi are filled with stories of Nephi doing one noble and courageous thing after another... and I'm going to tell you about one of them.

Nephi has traveled several days into the wilderness with his family when his father tells him that the Lord has commanded Nephi to return to Jerusalem with his brothers to retrieve the brass plates from Laban. The brass plates contain the records of their ancestors. Nephi's answer is firm and resolute... he will go. After a few attempts at visiting Laban, it becomes very clear that Laban intends to kill Nephi and his brothers and to never hand over the brass plates. On what becomes his final attempt, Nephi approaches Laban's home and finds Laban drunk and collapsed on the ground. The Spirit constrains Nephi to kill Laban, and when Nephi hesitates, he is instructed that "it is better that one man should perish than that an entire nation should dwindle and perish in unbelief..." without the record. Nephi kills Laban, retrieves the plates and grants Laban's servant his freedom if he will join them on their journey to the promised land.

Nephi is righteous and firm and unwavering and inspiring. And as our Sunday School teacher pointed out last Sunday, he is also human, and he grants us a glimpse of that from time to time. The first time the brothers attempted to get the plates from Laban, they cast lots to see which one would go and make the request. The lot fell on Laman, the oldest. He leaves on the errand but returns empty-handed and tells his brothers that he had to flee because Laban threatened to kill him. And then the scriptures say, "...and we began to be exceedingly sorrowful." Reading between the lines, I see a young man trying to do his best. He has just completed a journey of several days through the wilderness back to Jerusalem with a couple of his brothers most likely murmuring most of the way. And when they try to do what they have been sent to do, their lives are threatened. I think for a time Nephi was at a loss for what to do, and I am so thankful he wrote that he was exceedingly sorrowful about it.
Because I want to be like Nephi. And there are times in my life when I am temporarily at a loss for what to do, and during those times I don't feel like I'm being like Nephi... until I saw this side of him. The important thing is to know the end of the story. We know that after his period of sorrow, however long or short it was, he rose to the occasion and with the help of the Lord accomplished with his brothers what they set out to do (read the whole story here).

Every so often I hear debates going on about the "best" way to blog, especially as women. I've read women wishing other women would be more honest and not present their life in such a picture-perfect light on their blog (have you seen this? It's written by a guy in his twenties to poke fun at mommy blogs, and it's stinking hysterical). I've also read the other end of the debate where people have discussed how it's possible to be too honest and share too many complaints regarding how unfairly life is treating you with whoever out there might be listening. I think there's value in both ends of the spectrum. When I see a picture of a beautifully decorated mantel or a spotless kitchen, it inspires me to make my home a more beautiful place. I am guilty of arranging things in a way so that I wouldn't be embarrassed to post a picture of it on the internet. On the other hand, I have been grateful when friends have opened up about a truly horrendous day at their house and how it made them feel, because it makes it easier for me to not take myself too seriously when I am dealing with a similar situation at a later time. What it all comes down to is that if you are blogging regularly, it must be satisfying, and you can blog about whatever you want to, whether you're at either extreme of the spectrum or somewhere in the middle.

I think Nephi (not a blogger, but still a writer) fell somewhere in the middle. He desired to record the events that showed how good the Lord had been to him and his family in the good times and the bad. He is always uplifting and inpsiring and encouraging. But sometimes he opens up and is extremely honest about how certain situations made him feel when appropriate, and that's when you read language like, "O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh...I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me" (2 Nephi 4:17-18).

I'd like to fall somewhere in the middle too. When I post something, I feel like I've made a small contribution to the world, and I want to make sure it's positive... so I try to share the very best of me. Somedays the best of me might include how I am coping with the worst of what is going on.

So I think that's why I want to confess to you that I just emerged from an episode with depression. It was the strongest it has been since this point in my life. I'm not even quite sure what caused it. I think my emotions were very close to the surface after experiencing such a wonderful Christmas that it left me open and vulnerable to an emotional crash.  I hid it well. I even had to confess to Danilo that it had happened tonight before I posted this for anyone else to read. I started to recognize it for what it was one night when I realized how excited I was to go to sleep because it would be a temporary escape from reality. If you have never felt the pangs of depression, I expect a statement like that to sound ludicrous to you. After all, I have a loving husband, and a precious daughter, a warm home and food to eat. I truly hope you never know why. Don't be alarmed though. I am armed with tricks and techniques to combat it that I didn't have the first time depression came knocking at my door. While I'm never excited when it rears its ugly head, I am thankful each time it has happened because I become more familiar with what it is and how to better cope the next time. There is a book called Living With a Black Dog: His Name is Depression that I found a lot of comfort in reading during the last stages of my first bout with depression. Anyway, the last page of the book has a picture of the man embracing the black dog. While it can be fearsome and horrific, I too have learned to love what my black dog has done for me in teaching me humility and compassion and a mountain of other lessons I treasure, as well as strengthening my relationship with God and His Son, Jesus Christ.

As I came out of my first episode with depression, which had lasted nine months, I emerged with a passion to extend hope to anyone who found themselves in that condition. If you are there, I want to tell you that I have been where you are, and there is a way out. Even for you.