We were on a Les Mis kick at our house for a whole month

after this

and this

my brother Andrew (top center) after a Friday night performance of Les Miserables at his high school

Danilo may have walked around the house singing things like, "And now I'm off to brush my teeeeeth"...to the tune of I Dreamed a Dream.

I get so swallowed up not only in the music of Les Miserables, but in the story. Of the worth of the human soul in God's eyes that is displayed in so many of the characters and hope amidst complete and utter despair. It is a story so masterfully told and it changes my life in some way every time I see it.

“Is there not in every human soul [as in Jean val Jean] a primitive spark, a divine element, incorruptible in this world and immortal in the next, which can be developed by goodness, kindled, lit up, and made to radiate, and which evil can never entirely extinguish?”

-Victor Hugo

The whole experience may have rubbed off a little on Gracie, too.

A Month Ago Today was a Really Happy Day

So we dressed up really nice

because my sister was marrying

the love of her life.

Lots of special people came to town,
Colin's family from Indiana, Aunt Paula from California, and

Kelli (Arizona), Rakel (Sweden) and Joe (Missouri) to name a few.

and we may have thrown the most successful

Utah Mormon wedding dance party known to...Utah

(oh, you thought you were here to

shake some hands, grab some cheesecake

and run? Get your hands in the air!).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8sOYvVtB43k

And so ended the summer that I went from

no brothers-in-law to three.

I am so thankful for these people.

Mr. & Mrs. Vargas

nieces waiting for Cynthia & Jose

with my sisters-in-law

And then we danced. My family was also there and it was fun to have them experience a Latino wedding with us. Danilo let them know he wanted to see them on the dance floor, and they did NOT disappoint (although I was most amused by my dad who danced for the first time in my life, and must have been so taken aback that I didn't record it). And watch that last clip of Danilo dancing with my mom and tell me I'm not the luckiest girl in the world.

We were so happy to be a part of Cynthia and Jose's special day. It was wonderful from beginning to end.



Note: This post is also known as I Get My 2nd Brother-In-Law. Please watch for my 3rd brother-in-law coming this September.

The 10th

What started out in 2001 as this


has grown into a 4th of July tradition involving in-laws and family on both sides. If you want to stay out, you better be inside or with the youngin's (click on the collage for a better view).

Wait. Who is that going after Danilo? Just my 80-year-old grandfather. He dishes it out as well as any of the rest of us can.


On this 10th anniversary, we'd like to thank our founder, Uncle Russell.

The Alaskan Cruise Adventure

If you click on the collages, you'll be able to see them bigger and better.

THE CAR RIDE
Our Alaskan Disney Cruise began with a 15-hour drive to Vancouver, British Columbia in Canada which we broke into two days. Gracie did extremely well other than giving Andrew a hard time and only had one major meltdown the entire trip.



SEATTLE
After driving 12 hours the first day, we arrived in Redmond, Washington where my great-aunt Angela and her husband Dick live. Their beautiful house is shown far right center below. We spent that next day touring Seattle.


A three hour drive the next day took us to Vancouver and to our cruise ship, the Disney Wonder. We enjoyed an incredible and unforgettable vacation on ship and in every port it landed, all thanks to

THE CHARACTERS
Gracie was a little stunned when we set her on Belle's lap within the first hour of boarding the ship. Throughout the week she warmed up to the idea and by the end was dragging us after characters saying, "Picture." Her favorite by far was Minnie Mouse.


THE ENTERTAINMENT
My Dad was pulled up by the Disney entertainers at the opening celebration to do the YMCA with three other dads. He made us so proud! Our family took part in the Disney car derby and I achieved my lifelong goal of assisting a magician on stage.


THE SHOWS
We were wowed every night by incredible performances like Toy Story the Musical.
TRACY ARM, ALASKA
was one of the most awe-inspiring moments I've ever had in nature. It's a location in Alaska where you can't land, but everyone comes out on the decks and verandahs of the ship to be amazed. I knew we were headed towards a glacier and that that would mean icebergs. I really tried to remember that the cruise industry has been going to Alaska for decades and hasn't sunk a ship. But several other people that day mentioned how the ice made them a little uneasy. It started out with an iceberg or two scattered here or there and I really thought that the captain was dodging them. Until I saw an entire sea of icebergs ahead of us and realized we were going to plow through them. I was really thankful to see the Carnival cruise ship coming back our direction (top left) having already been where we were headed. We saw sea otters sitting on the icebergs and eagles nesting in the trees as we slowly cruised through the area and ended up at Stanley Glacier.


WHALE WATCHING IN JUNEAU
Did I say that Tracy Arm was where I had the most awe-inspiring experience I had ever had with nature? Now I'm stuck between that and our whale watching adventure, and I'm not going to choose between the two. After leaving the cruise ship at the port in Juneau, we boarded a motor boat with 10 or 12 other people and headed off into the massive ocean. I was going to consider my experience worthwhile if I saw a whale tail or two, but an hour and a half or so later, we had probably seen whales and orca (I learned there's a difference) surface 30 or 40 times. It was amazing. We also saw and heard them shoot water out of their spouts.


Our captain and crew member said we had come out on one of the best days either one of them could remember.


BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC ALASKA
The other ports we stopped in were in Skagway and Ketchikan. We learned about their histories and shopped in their shops like I try to do in most places I visit. But the landscape again was like nothing I had ever seen.


JORGE & NANDOS

Do you ever meet people that you know you're going to have a hard time saying goodbye to? I knew within a couple of encounters that that was going to be the case with our dinner servers, Jorge (from Portugal) and Nandos (from Indonesia). Cruises are known for their hospitality and charismatic dinner servers from all over the world, so I was pretty sure I was going to like them. But these two men had found a place in our hearts way before it was time to go home. They made us feel like taking care of us was their genuine pleasure. They went the extra mile in everything they did, from bringing us both desserts when we couldn't decide between two (which didn't cost us any extra :), pouring Gracie's ketchup into a Mickey Mouse shape, cutting her food, and when she would fall asleep when we were still eating at 9:30 at night, they would make a bed out of chairs and tuck her in with a table cloth. They entertained us with magic tricks and shared pictures and stories of their families with us. Yes they were paid for their work, but they did it with an intensity and a goodness that inspired me and made me want to do any job I'm given in the future with much more energy and enthusiasm. This went on for six nights. When the seventh and last night came and it was time to say goodbye, our family had made a decision that made it a little easier for me. Along with some souvenirs from Alaska, we presented our two servers each with a Book of Mormon. We wrote to them in a letter how as a family we felt they had given us so much that we wanted to leave something precious to us behind. And if either one of them are able to benefit from reading it, the lasting happiness and peace the Book of Mormon has brought to me would be the greatest gift I could share with them.

Take a look at the bottom center picture where Nandos is laughing... hard. He was in charge of our drinks and got used to bringing us water and juice and soda. On one of the last evenings, he came to take my mom's order and she said, "I think I'm gonna be a little crazy tonight."
"Okay. I make you a Shirley Temple?" Nandos asked, thinking finally someone at our table might drink.
"No, a chocolate milk."
He laughed so hard, long enough that we were able to get out the camera. It was hysterical.

My Brother the Eagle

I love spring.

I can finally say that although I don't understand all of it, I am grateful for what I have experienced this past year....It was like I'd been hit by a train. Depression leaves you with nothing to live for, you hardly have the will to open your eyes, even though you have everything to live for.

the earliest stage of my depression
that smile is not real; I didn't know what was happening to me

I know how suffering feels. I know how it feels to be completely hopeless, to feel like you've lost everything, like you're garbage, to loathe yourself. I know what it feels like to believe that God has abandoned you, and that it's all your fault.

Christmas Day 2005
I don't know who took this picture, but I didn't feel I was worth
the lipstick on my face; I'll spare the pictures on the days I didn't
make an effort to get ready for the day

But what a glorious gift it is to come to the realization that all of that is lies, and that in your suffering you have actually come to more fully know God, understand what He went through, and become more like Him.

This comes from my journal, February 2006. I was realizing that I was overcoming a near year-long battle with depression and that I was going to make it. As a result, that spring was especially meaningful to me. It was like as the world was coming back to life, so was I. I saw everything with new eyes. And every time spring comes around again, those same feelings and memories of being excited to live and love life again return more powerfully than they do at any other time of the year.

Some of the most important things that came to me as a result of this most defining time of my life so far was:

1. A deeper love and appreciation for family. I am not capable of expressing what I learned about how much my parents love me through this experience and how it brought me closer to each of my sisters and brother.

this is the picture that hung on the wall during my depression;
I remember looking at myself in the picture thinking
"where did that girl go?" I started to believe she wouldn't
ever come back

2. I met this boy not too long after

finding my ultimate definition of happiness after so much despair

and 3. I emerged with the assurance that GOD IS ALWAYS THERE, present, mindful of you, even when you are convinced He isn't. This understanding has helped me every single day as well as through other difficulties that have come.

The following song on this video brings me to tears when I consider it as a prayer. My sister Hailey discovered it when she went to Lion King last year, and I want to thank her for being a giver and letting me share it here, because I know it is meaningful to her as well. To anyone who has ever experienced an endless night. If you are still there, may you find the strength to hang on because I promise dawn will come.


It almost makes me uncomfortable to write this last part because I don't know how to say it, but there may be some of you reading this that remember this period of my life and you were part of the answer to many many prayers. Your concern, your love, your support, and unconditional friendship helped me to make it. Thank you.

What made this Christmas different...

A sight that never ceases to prick my heart is of our Christmas tree lying sideways waiting for the garbage truck to come. It always gets to me. Thank you for brightening our house and filling it with the wonder of Christmas...I will now leave you on the curb. Our curb happens to be a bus stop, however, and someone propped our tree and our neighbor's tree upright while they were waiting for the bus, which I thought was kind of silly and cute. Yes, I have a hard time letting go of Christmas every year. It's time to blog about three things that made this year's Christmas different.

1. GRACIE

Here was her impression of Christmas...



She had this amused look on her face all morning that I think said, "Mom, why don't we play with pretty paper every day?!" I'm sure parents of older kids can tell me it's going to get sweeter and sweeter with every year. I'm convinced!

Thanks so much to family for giving us a place to come celebrate, delicious food, and sweet gifts. We love you!!


2. The GRACIE song.

When Gracie was born I put a song on our blog called Gracie by Ben Folds. Apparently my brother Andrew got a hold of the sheet music and has been practicing it on the piano to get it ready for Christmas. And here's the kicker--he talked Danilo into singing it on Christmas Eve. Danilo doesn't sing for people. Danilo only sings in the bathroom. Danilo wouldn't let me post the video, but it was one of the sweetest gifts I have ever received. Thanks little brother!

3. Jason Luna

Danilo knew the wonderful Luna family on his mission in Orlando. That's where we ended up going on our honeymoon and Sister Luna (who works for Disney) and her family did so much to make our trip so incredible!! Their son Jason moved out to Utah the week before Christmas to start work and school here, and we kind of absorbed him into our family for the holidays. He was so nice to put up with us. We spent time with both the Achters and Byingtons. Coming to all our Christmas parties meant that he met both sides of my entire family. I don't know if any boyfriends have even ever had it that intense! Christmas night he was teaching my sisters how to latin dance. There was some serious Wii competition throughout the holiday. The day after Christmas we ate out at the restaurant where he works where we felt like we had the inside scoop on what to order and how. We just really like him!